Disorder.

You and her are well acquainted. They've never met her however, and she really wants to make a good impression. Pity that you both know that won't happen. Glass after glass, and you just sit back and wait for all of this to take a turn for the worst. And then it does, and it's not pretty. You just watch as she slowly makes her way to the floor, as she starts babbling as she stares aimlessly at the stars. Just rolling your eyes as she vomits all over the floor, unable to pick her self up, laughing silently as tears begin to make their way from her mascara smudged eyes to the dirt she's lying on. She's holding on to the only thing she knows. Scared to look into the unknown. Letting herself be selfish for just once, because she never gets to have what she wants. Before you know it, she's reaching for her mobile phone, in a pathetic attempt to find a way out of all this. You try and stop her, but she just won't listen. Now they will be left to deal with all of this, yet again. You can see it in her eyes, that old, familiar look, 'protect me from what I want' even though you both know she doesn't have a clue what that is. Now she's asking you to apologise to these strangers about her behavior because she can't face them herself. In and out of consciousness, and you'd forgotten how beautiful she could look, forgot how much you love her, forgot how much you admire her.

S.