Your head replays him on the staircase watching you. Why the fuck does he keep watching you. Why the fuck does your head keep replaying this. Why the fuck does your mind always fuck you over like this? That empty feeling is back. Good Luck Babe. Your getting in your desired state of mind. There you are happy. Happy to fall over. Happy to bruise yourself. Happy to graze yourself. Self destruction has become a game you like to play. You wonder how many drinks it will take to mix with your Alphamox and cold to get you rightly fucked up- apparently only 3. Your dirty dancing with Bonnie and now you LOVE your life and everything and everyone and someone and no one and him and him and her. Three hours later , you can barely stand, your ears are ringing, you're hurling abuse at every person who gives you a second look. You're ready to sleep on the sidewalk. Another Saturday and another carelesss.
M.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
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